Free Pizza!

Pizza is out of Solitary Confinement

2009-09-28T10:17:00.000-07:00

Due to good behavior Free Pizza has been let out of Solitary Confinement for the first time in a little over 7 months. Pizza tells me it was really hard. "The only thing that kept me going was Death Cab For Cutie on my ipod." Now that Pizza is out he is really excited to have some visitors. "It was great to see that free pizza dancer. After all I have been through the last couple months seeing that put a real smile on my peperoni."

2009-02-21T10:31:00.001-08:00

The Free Pizza dance movement has begun.

Pizza Needs a Hobby

2009-02-18T18:18:00.000-08:00

Free Pizza wanted me to pass this onto you all. "Well ladies and gentlemen, it looks like I'm going to be behind bars for a long time. Thank goodness for the internet. Now with all this extra time on my hands I can do what I really want to do. Find some awsome bands to check out. You can help my sanity by sending me some leads. What bands do you like?"

Pizza wants house arrest!

2009-02-18T15:20:00.000-08:00

Pizza has petitioned the Honorable Judge Mitchell Chambers of the 6th circuit court to review his case. He asked the judge for leniency and cited the Bernard Madoff case. Pizza wants judge Chambers to move him from his maximum security prison cell to the comfort of his own home in what is called a "house arrest." Pizza says, "If Bernard Madoff admitted to stealing $50 billion and he gets to stay home, why can't I" I just walked across the street. Pizza submitted the following document for review: http://abcnews.go.com/Blotter/WallStreet/story?id=6480363&page=1

Free Pizza

2009-02-17T19:13:00.000-08:00

"Pizza has been sentenced to life, but some people don't think that is right." said Mary Jones, pizza activist. "There is a grassroots movement gaining steam to try to set pizza free. We have collected money and are currently working to retain a new defense attorney on behalf of pizza. Please join us and say Free Pizza!"

Free Pizza Guilty

2009-02-17T19:08:00.000-08:00

Free Pizza Cried Out "I'm innocent. I mean...If I am not pizza then what the hell am I" as the bailiff carried him away. The Judge awarded the maximum sentence. 35 to life.

Pizza Locked Up

2009-02-17T18:50:00.000-08:00

So it has began... Earlier this evening Pizza was picked up by the cops for crossing the street. The charge? Littering. Pizza shouted "I'm not trash, I'm a slice of Pizza." Pizza could face up to a 35 year mandatory sentence.